iloveyoo.
iloveyoo..
iloveyoo...
TELL ME YOU LOVE ME <3
i want more LOVE!!
more and more and more loves!
update again abt sunday.
rushing now(:

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This week is really so hiong.

so much things to do ._.

i manage to chiong finish my MPO assignment with minghua.

Thanks to him.

Though i still feel that the textbook thing is not really included..

But well.,without him,i won't be able to do it.

hmmms.



i have been skipping class..

can't believe myself..

i think i already skip about 7class.

haiz.

the MPO and the important thing for my member have to be done.

i am so trense by the intense environment.

sighh.

but with GOD,ALL THINGS IS POSSIBLE,AMEN?

AMEN!

^^well well..the english assignment given to me today and have to be handled

up tomorrow.

still have to TYPE AND PRINT OUT.

*ROARS*

no laptop gives me really lots of problems..

I have got so much things on hand not done.

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

PENDING:

1)Individual english assignment(due date:24/10/08)

2)Group english assignment(due date:7/11/08)

3)Group MPO assignment(due date:5/11/08)

4)Individual Maths assignment(due date:4/11/08)

5)the card

6)reaching out

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

*faints already*

how ah?how ah?

alrights<:

bring out my confidence and confess:

I CAN FINISH ALL MY ASSIGNMENTS ON TIME.

I CAN FINISH THE CARD BEFORE SATURDAY.

I CAN REACH OUT TO MANY POTENTIAL FRIENDS.

I,DELPHINE FUR QING TONG CAN DO ALL THESE I SAID!

*Walk by FAITH and NOT by SIGHT*

i am so fatique..

i feel like i can sleep for days man!

*roars*

okok..all roarings stopped here((:



i want to be a encourager.

i want to be a listening ear to all bitter souls.

i want to be a good daughter to my heavenly FATHER and earthly parents.

i want to love GOD wholeheartedly and people fervently.

i want to spread my candyness to sweeten bitter souls.

i want more friends.

i want to be mroe tolerant.

i want to be more hardworking.

i want ot be used by my leaders.

i want to serve my leaders,friends and GOD.

i want to be a loving person to all.

i want to build up strong friendships with my cg and not just c-friends.



I have so many WANTS!

AND I KNOW,I WILL BE ABLE TO DO IT,

BY GOD's GRACE AND LOVE((:

DADDY.

I LOVE YOU.

FILL ME MORE AND MORE!!!

MOREEEE~
I WANT YOU,YOU ARE MINE((:

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i skipped school once again.

so stressed up with things.

SIGHH~

hahahahahahahaa!

must laugh more so that stress will not be so pressurizing.

goshh*

here i am at jurong point mac donald using computer.

i am damn stress with alot of things la?

today i invited shawn and wei kiat to church for The Edge,

Hopefully,by faith,they will not fly me on aeroplane.(:

i am so tensed!

OH FATHER~~~~~~~~

give me more of Your presence.

pour your rain upon me.

fill me more and more with Your Holy Spirit.

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I did not go to school today..
yes i am..
still quite upset with the thing happened yesterday.
i had a nightmare of it.
everything that happened and things that was talked about all was in my nightmare.
I dreamt of being scolded by *them*.
and then out of a sudden,
i am at fuhua..sitting down with my school uniform.LOL.
they were catching peepos with long fringes,
OF COURSE.
i was caught.
the first prefect say,"VERY LONG hor?"
my band members shouted,"she already graduate la!"
she went to pull my fringe.
i was irritated and slapped the prefect.
she fell down.
then the head prefect came and shouted,"your fringe is long la!"
she pulled my collar.
i shouted,"MA DE!pull me?"
i used one hand hold her collar and pulled her up.
::as if i am some wrestler =X::
i bashed them up real hard.
then blood and bruises blah blah..
then the first prefect shouted,"ni deng zhe qiao!i take my injuries to court and sue you!"
*gosh*
i can't believe it.
in the dream i was very *hiong* la?
can't believe what i did.
everything was fought in a *leng leng* way..
so i felt so relieved in my dreams..
all my anger and sadness suddenly all released on those 2 prefects.
didn't know i really had so much strength,though.
i never really really fight like that before.
hurhurs.
this morning my bestie,CYNTHIA,
lend me her laptop.
THANK YOU ,CYNTHIA!
so,here i am..
using laptop to blog.
HAHA!
yeapps..well..
i have very bad headache since yesterday..
so,ya..
don't provoke me ok?
i am scare i will blow up..
alrights,
off to work(((:
buh-bye~

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Back to blog again(((:

woooo..life is so dead..

every week it is like i look forward to every friday and saturday.

today i learnt about one thing in lecture talking about:

EVERYBODY;ANYBODY;NOBODY;SOMEBODY..

it goes like this...:

There was an important job to be done.

EVERYBODY knew SOMEBODY would do it.

ANYBODY could have done it,

but NOBODY did it.

So,SOMEBODY got angry when he found that it should have been done by EVERYBODY.

But,EVERYBODY thought ANYBODY would do it.

In the end,

SOMEBODY reproached EVERYBODY because NOBODY did what could have been done by ANYBODY."

i sent this to my cg members which seemed to have created a big fuss.

i didn't know it was so sensitive.

i thought that they will have the same mind and thinking as me.

this is what i called assumptions.

and i was wrong.

i was shocked though.

but well..

i was thinking about it..

is it really so sensitive?

alrights.

i convinced myself by thinking that S33 is a family but i still have to be sensiive with the words i use.

they are family.but just different from real families we had.

but i think i have no family though.

thats why i will be so "into" the word "family" when it comes to my cg.

i tot they will share the same thinking and will not interpret wrongly.

didn't i sent another message just to clarify myself?

but well..the 1st message was still the main focus.

[ [ i clarify myself.and what did God says?don't have to defend yourself for God will defend for you.where is all these i have learnt?why am i not applying? ] ]

*so impulsive of me*

well... i guess i just have to stop sending all these messages?

or in a nicer way of speech,watch my words and make sure my message is not sensitive.

having too high expectations will get me into trouble.

anyway,who am i?

not a CGL,PCGL nor a COGL.

just purely a member.

i think i have been too tou ru into this family that

i want to share every single thing that i think is so true to them.

===========================

my CLOSE friend list:

s33

CYNTHIA

JEFFREY

===========================

who else will i think of?

i put S33 above all of these 3.

whatever i learnt and know,

my first though is S33.

i admit in the past i was not..

but now i am different.

don't be shocked by my sudden change.

and question how come why?can't be de mah.no one can be like that.

i have 24 hours.the difference is just that i think alot.

during the time i go toilet,on the way to school,in school,on the way to work,

during work and blah blah blah,I AM THINKING.

every second,i am changing.

if you really notice,

i have changed.

good or bad i do not judge it.

i think that i have become :

::more involved in this cg

::making alot of effort to dress up to promote "WOW FACTOR" and glorify God.

::trying to motivate my members.

but so what though?

i am not careful in my messages.

so,what should i do?

BE CAREFUL.

maybe yoo all do not see the changes..

but sometimes i think...

is it so important that peepos see my change?

************************************

and i analysed this way:

thinking + getting = motivating

thinking + not getting = demotivating

don't think + getting = extra bonus.

don't think + not getting = doesn't matters

SO,the outline is:" Don't go and think about whether being seen or not."
because it will hurt u.

*************************************

well...out of a sudden a feel my emptiness and loneliness touch me.

and i just can't help tearing.

blame it on myself.

-assumptions

-expectations on them(i know no one is perfect)

-emotions-led

-uncareful

*erms*

**smiles**

don't wish to think but thoughts are intruding into my mind.

maybe because i care too much about how they interpret my message..

care too much about how they think..

things are scary..

t*o***t* **e *o* ****e* wi*h *o* **t *e**** *o** *****.

these words are sensitive.so i used asterix.

alrights alrights.

*spanks myself*

OUT OF MY MIND!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

*leaving this computer*

**blogging rakes my thoughts more and more*

feel so traumatized now.

*seek my perfect friend now*

dolphin wants to swim away..

*clique clique*

she is so emppty now..

is there anyone who lives in the Venus just like she is?

Labels: traumatizing me.

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it's this just so true?

some peepos ask me,"why are yoo so tough and strong?"

i told them i have to.

what else can i do when that is my only choice?

well..that how i now become over-strong.

come on..i don't depend on friends as much as some peepos do.

i grew up bullied and standing up for myself..

without teachers',friends' and parents' defence.

no one defends for me ever.

HAHA!thats's how i become strong.

this picture shows how i became strong though(:










indeed i am one like this picture describes.

Labels: EVERYBODY STAY STRONG...MAKE IT YOUR ONLY CHOICE..

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Labels: LIFE GOES ON....

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i am sooooo in fear.
but still here i am..
struggling hard and doing my best to lift it all up to God.
now i just wann to focus on my church,my cell groupo and mug hard on my studies.
i am sick of all those that is happening in my family.
my family consists of: a *****t or yoo call it a m*******.
a nagger.
and a struggling kid.
don't bother anymore.
i vent it here.
though it's not as vicious as how i scold in the past..
well..no point.
forget it..
सिक्क ऑफ़ अल ठेस।
श्रः!

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ARGHH~
school is giving me headache.
i have split headache today!
my head is running wild!
i hope everything will be alright!

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