THE QUEEN T A K E N . B Y . S J J
THE KING T A K E N . B Y . F Q T
QUEEN'S SPEECH T H E . V E R D I C T
Love ♥ I L O V E Y O UReminiscing ♥ A . P A R T . O F . M Y . L I F E |  i sent my kiss to : ALL my S33 family ; Cynthia ; Jeffrey ; June ; Warren ; Liang ; Just a glimpse, i have watched 2 movies 大喜事 and 幸福万岁 (: with minghua and ah sheng respectively. yes indeed i enjoyed! this niu year i only get 1 pathetic angbao from my mother on thursday. sian luhh. again i am seating here and looking at blissful faces of people. well i am used to it. recently ah sheng actually said something to be that blown me off. really blown me off. ask me privately if you want to know. for your info, he is married.so don't guess too much.hehe.just in case. 我的演戏被识破了； yes i am shocked. all these years.. he is the only one who really notice me. for ONCE! i felt so touched. someone can just notice what i do. he only notice the way i look at things, the way i speak and my actions. and like that he got it. no one really pay attention to me and analyse about me. at least niu year,someone walked into my zone. (: thankyou for your attention. today i went out with minghua and bryan. went to eat Yuki and Yaki. HEHE! it is really nice.. it rake the memories of me with minghua last time.. haha.then later baobei came.. korkor jeffrey came.. spencer came... kelvin came... and gary came with his girlfriend... yeah..was dancing para para all the way.. haha..panda owner is invading into panda's brain. but nah.she danced it off. today is quite lonely but well..a memorable one. Announcement: Lim Beng Hwa is officially my KOR from today onwards(: 0 comment[s] | back to top HAPPY CHINESE 牛 YEAR TO ALL~! I ate the whole day today with my parents and tenants. STEAMBOAT is definitely one of my favourite.. especially with your love ones.. today i am so loved by them! they "kiap" the things i want and put it in my bowl. YAY~ pampered girl today. i drank MARTELL , Rivercrest and Tiger Beer with them. ya..never drunk as usual! TSK! hehe. i wonder when can i be drunk. LOL! Ah sheng treat me to movie "Love Matters" . yeah~ he is my tenant. he is really very gentleman.. opening the door, letting me walk first, carry things for me and helpiong me put the cup at the hole when i missed it. HAHA! it is quite nice watching movie with him though(: well..don't think so much,he is married~! hOhO~ yes. and then we were drinking beer together when we reached home. then the two other tenants joined in. they sure love to drink with me i should say. HAHA! aftermath, my parents,3 tenants and I went to outram park there at 11plus pm. and hear the sounds of crackers. we did not manage to catch it on time. but well...never mind! =J then we went walk walk.. i am very tired le! going to orh orh le~ LOVES ALL~ 0 comment[s] | back to top HAPPY CHINESE NEW YEAR EVE,GUYS! (((: woohoo! now is Chinese New Year Eve le! I simply can't wait to eat steamboat!! OHHHHH~ I am going to eat steamboat with my family later in the afternoon! YAY! i can't wait to eat with my spiritual family, S33! hhoho!can't wait! can't wait!! 1ST FEBRUARY! I AM GOING TO EAT WITH THEMMM! woohoooooo! TSK! mind my excitement.. i love them:) yes. the past will be the past. being the initiator is tough sometimes, but when i think of God and my leader.. yeah! i gonna do something for them. YES! honour my leader and the other authorities((: gonna tune myself on the right track! gonna pray like never before. people's prayer requests that i DIE DIE ALSO want from: 1.MingYao 2.Shannon 3.Xue Ting OOPS!did i sound biased?! i want it all!! okays!gonna pester them for it! TSK! i believe my spiritual family will have breakthroughs! yes!i gonna pray and fast and confess! i want to rise up to the next level! and i want my spiritual family members to rise up too! we will rise up TOGETHER! woohoo! TO NEGATIVE-NESS IN ME: SHOOO! i bind you in Jesus's name! I shall crucify my flesh to fast and pray. You can't stop me from being positive. YES! GOODBYE! GET OUT OF MY LIFE,i say. so. i am going to change everything of me! inside out! not just appearance but the real heart of mine(:  Time to orh orh le! nite nite guys! LOVEYA!* /(@.@) 0 comment[s] | back to tophey readers!no worries.. the panda is still kicking. HAHA! the process is, "Panda had moved on and let nature take its course. Whether panda owner loves her or not, it is no longer important. She had moved on with the power of God's love(:" if you are curious of ending,when it really ends,i will tell you:) okayys!!WAKAKAS! yes. my life is refreshed once again! ((: phew! lucky i get back on track before i fall further in! indeed God had been good((: during this period of time, HE had directed my path. i believe all these happen with a reason. now i have the chance to see another type of people that lives on this world.haha! need more exposure! LOL! The reason that i managed to overcome this problem is regards to 1 God and 3 people: JESUS Ming Yao Shannon June Thank you for all the advice and empathy(: 0 comment[s] | back to toplet me tell all of you a story :A story of panda and her owner One day panda was very bored..so she went into panda owner's shop to take a look. they were talking about what phone is good. and as it goes on, panda owner took her phone to miss call his own phone without letting her know. the night after that day,he messaged her and say he is panda owner and that he took her phone to miss call his own handphone and hope she don't mind. yes,indeed.panda did not mind.as usual. they smsed each other daily from morning till night. he asked her alot of questions about her,of course. she told him..even the most crucial part that only some knows. he said he understand and he will sayang her aand take care of her. she asked him, "I think if you have a girlfriend,she will be really jealous." he said, "don't have how to be jealous?" "what if have?" "i will still sayang you" *sweetness engulfed her heart* "what if your girlfriend wants you to stop?" "then i rather just be panda owner." "thanks((: thanks for doting on me." "you are the most welcome.sweetie..." one day,panda's handphone went out of battery. panda owner asked her to go find him and he will pass her a battery. at first,she rejected the offer because he is not the boss and it is not very good to let people buy you something like that and it is quite expensive.. however after panda owner's persistent persuasion, she gave in and went to find him. and yes,help her change her battery and chatted awhile and she had to go because she was meeting her friend. of course,panda felt very loved. panda owner is like a camera that could capture panda's love language and makes her feel dote and loved. after such a long break up between panda and her ex, this is the first time she felt so in love. her heart was triggered by all the actions panda owner did. soon,she really felt in love with him.. one day, panda owner wants panda to go visit him before he goes on business trip to m'sia. she was very contented as she would like to see him.. she went down an hour earlier before her work starts and indeed she saw panda owner.. he asked her to come in to sit.. so yes,after much consideration, she went in.. when there was no customer, panda owner grabbed panda and kissed her. yes she felt loved. she was shy,indeed. she looked at away from his eyes and asked, "why did you kiss your close friend(panda)? Do you kiss all your close friends too?" panda owner answered, "No,i only kiss those i like." obviously without a need to think, panda was touched. and the kiss went on.. when a customer came in, she just went back to her seat. and when the customer goes, he came to him, pat her head and sayang her.. and kissed her head saying, "when panda owner is not around,panda don't anyhow run ok?" panda answered shyly. "orh." panda owner smiled at her.. then there it comes another customer comes in.. so panda was kinda bored, soo she walked around the shop.. when the customer goes, he came and hug her tight. although panda was touched, she said, "scary..i want to run away now." imagine what panda owner said. he said, "It's too late,you are mine already.you cannot run away anymore. because i am holding you tight to me." panda's heart was pounding fast and cheeks are becoming red. she turned away from his eyes. she dares not look at him at his eyes at all.. before she went to work, he told her again, "when i am away,don't anyhow run okay?" same she said, "Orh." he kissed her goodbye for his business trip that occurs aftermath. there it goes..for 3days.. panda was alone missing panda owner.. thinking of him like crazy.. wondering how is panda owner in malaysia.. she waited for him to sms her when he comes back.. on the third day, her patience was lacking and lacking until she could not take it anymore.. she started to cry.started to drink wine.. because she could not find any other things to unleash.. so she waited until 6.42pm on wednesday, at last he smsed her asking, "Sweetie,what are you doing?" panda was shocked. she smsed him and asked, "you are back??omy!" he said, "ya..." she told him, "i am missing you like crazy unitl i cry" he told her, "sayang sayang,don't cry k?" soon after he sent her another message, "talk to you later..i am busy at the moment.." panda was sad and disappointed.. so she did not reply.. she had a very strong feeling to go and find him at his shop.. when she went home, she bathed and prepared to go out to find him.. before that she smsed him and asked, "what time you end work?(:" but he did not reply worrying that she may reach late as it is peak hour, she cabbed down.. on the cab.. *handphone's message ringtone rings...* it was panda owner.. she saw the reply,"9" at that time,it was only 7.40pm.. so she reached around 8pm.. loitering around his area... not knowing what to do...she just hide at the nearby wall and looks at him from afar..hoping that he will notice her.. but no..he did not..he was indeed busy. when she saw him having no customer. she meesaged him and said. "want me to wait for you?(:" he did not reply.. coming to 9pm... the shop is still not closed.. there is no more customer... but message is still not replied..... but panda was there still waiting.. still pining hopes that he will reply just that he did not notice.. cold wind blew....the panda feeling cold,stood behind the wall... waiting for panda owner.. until 9.32pm.. they started to pack up.. and then she saw a girl in the shop.. panda was afraid.. panda afraid that that is his girlfriend.. worrying..panda began to work around... mumbling,"pleaseeeee...not frighten me..pleaseeeee..." then after the shop closed, she saw him accompanying the girl to bus stop.. can you imagine how she felt? how afraid? how lonely..? how helpless? she was soooo afraid that it is his girlfriend... her mind began to run wild.. thinking, "why he did not reply my message?please faster reply me.. should i call him?oh nooo noo noo! cannot.. i am too afraid..what if he don't want to pick up my call? my gosh..how?how?how?" untill 10.36pm.. he replied, "ya...where are u???" she replied, "near your shop." he replied fast and asked, "where???" she said, "outside your shop." he said, "you wait awhile..i send my friend to take bus first." she did not reply..just stood outside his shop.. hoping things will go well.. that "awhile" was a lonely night for her.. after half an hour,he started walking back.. then she saw his tired eyes... so she said to him, "you are very tired ba?go home and sleep ba(:" he said, "ok..then u leh?" "oh..i go canal." "for what?no no..go back home.." "don't want..i want ot go canal..i waited for 2hours already.. i don't wish to go home so fast." "ok.i go with you then." "ok ah!sorry. can i don't be so understanding today?(:" so they walked... until they crossed the road which his house is near from.. he told her, "i think i go home(: i am tired.." so as usual,panda told him, "okay lo((: take care." he asked her to kiss her. she doesn't want because it is too public.. and her heart is so uncertain.. so he grabbed her hands and say, "then we go to a corner lo.(:" then he started holding her tight and kissed her. she asked him, "is like=love?" "love can be processed to love but like is not love." immediately,her heart sank............. still maintaining her smile.. she said,"i see..i think i have fallen for you." panda owner kissed her. he did not say anything. she was very devastated in the inside.. when her bus came,she went up the bus.. she smsed him and asked, "am i your close friend or?" what do you he said?((: he said, "close friend ba." tears begin running down.. she replied,"ok(: have a good sleep.panda owner((:" she sent him another message, "if one day you fall for me,please tell me(:" he said, "i think i would but is not now.give me some time k. i need to i have a few things to do...just give me some time...." she said, "i know,i understand..i don't to be your burden. your happiness concerns me(:" he said,"thank..." there it went.. she went home.. *p.s can you imagine how panda felt? she could only stand there helplessly... heart being triggered and left there alone, again.." This story seems very loving and sweet the beginning right? you must have thought it ended sweetly.. no it did not. everything always seem so nice and sweet in the beginning.. but who know what is the actual situation? what do you think when you read the story? do you think the panda owner loves her? or do you think the panda owner only want to lust her? tell me your comments. you are free to do so(: answers may be revealed soon(: 0 comment[s] | back to topi am depressed.too tired after crying over it.. i want to go and sleep now.. nite,readers((': i am just a *dress* for you. i am feeling the phobia once again.. God,i'm sorry.. i felt condemned and guilty. sorry for the negative thoughts.. 0 comment[s] | back to top Yes..i went for a drink with my babe,June.. We are crazy!! It had been so long that i really laugh like mad.. and the best thing is.... SHE LAUGHS WITH ME! this is simply great.. at last i found someone who is half like me! you know.. i am a crazy girll who wants to have fun and laughters and the people i usually hang with, are just too shy,quiet and *no really smiling* for me.. sometimes when i a smile, i think i am an alien to them though. but..well..i have found one! today.. we crapped about all the guys' things and blah blah.. and we are simply so "into" it.. over there imaging the nice things.. LALALA~! frankly speaking, someone triggers the love of my heart.. ever since my past relationship, i had phobia of love.. simply can't trust guys will love me.. but somehow or rather....yeah(: i decide to not go on. and yeah.. so we went for a drink near my school! HohO! super cool.. the cake is nice..the drink is nice. we bought a glass of *i forgot the name* wine with green apple syrup! NICE! XD and what's more? the guy actuaaly give us another free drink that blends with passion. the passion wine is the above i am holding.. i am enjoying the slackness i am in today.. simply just put everything behind me and drink,laugh and talk! the guy even treat us the little nice nice biscuits! MIND YOU. they are SUPER DELICIOUS! hoHo!i recommend people to go! so ya..end up drinking two cups.. and June is already drunk like a gundu! HAHAHA!*she is going to kill me if she sees this* and i was like still sober!? and the guy was saying,"WOW!you drink fast and still sober.. you are a good drinker!" i am like *smiling to him* i enjoy being a little tipsy somehow.. i can be more daring..and no stresss.. hoHo!but i will try to resist!HAHA! yeah..(: i had a quite good day today.. she brights my day.. and she KISSED me!hahahahas! we are not lesbians.. simply we are enjoying with each other.. i piggy back her.. and then too bad..we don't want to climb that mountain back to school.. so we went on a cab and tada!back to school.. still laughing away..my father came.. i asked him to bring her to nearest mrt.. so he decided buona vista.. so yeah..i asked her to take cab.. and she is drunk luhh!but i can't accompany her cos i have to rush to tuition.ya.. so she arrived at her love love's house. and yeah..we have complicated love stories.. and we empathise with each other.. enjoy her stupidity and funnicity.. hahas! yeah.. *my student's mother will be finding another tutor cos she sees that i am busy.. sad sad!  i am missing you,panda owner!  when i say,"i want to run away." you said,"it's too late, you can't run because i am holding tight!" *blehs* 0 comment[s] | back to topermmmm.i think i am really becoming a panda soon. hurhur! i am really tired! oh yeah.i forgot to say, xueting now has learnt to wear contact lens. she bought a purple one.. it is quite nice though! haha! my owner had gone to malaysia yesterday.. sobs!i am so lonely liddat luhh! no one sms me all that.. like no one sayang me liddat. totally slack today.. my friend june was not here. sadded. i felt so insecure!!!!!!!!! my gosh* it had been long since i felt insecured! no june and worse no panda owner. suddenly i am lost with what i am doing. totally lost! i wanted to pon class.. but hmmm ya... i still ended up in the class.. right at the back. so was talking to two of my friends,Liang and Alan. they are really in the dark side.. they are real negative.. i think i have been playing the light side.. T.T but they are really nice people.. i think they deserve better:) i will keep them pregnant in my spirit((: by faith.. yes..(((: i want to be positive:) yes,positive! i want to be a good girl.. a good panda.. a good member.. a good cogc(: i want to strike a balance between all these! WOOTS! jiayou,kawaii panda! LOVES! panda owner.. faster come back luhh! TSK! 0 comment[s] | back to topoh yes! i think i am damn absent mindedfor drawing $30, take the card and never take the money. *faints* when i go back,no more!GONE! haiz! how absent minded can me,his panda be? gosh* 0 comment[s] | back to topni de hui hua ling la zhe你的绘画凌乱着 zai zhe ge shi ke 在这个时刻 wo xiang qi fen quan pang de bai ge 我想起喷泉旁的白鸽 tan mi san luo le 甜蜜散乱了 qing xu mo ming de la che 情绪莫名的拉扯 wo hai ai ni ne 我还爱你呢 ban ni duan duan xu xu chang zhe ge 伴你断断续续唱着歌 jia zhuang mei shi le 假装没事了 shi jian guo le zhuo le 时间过了走了 ai qing mian li xuan zhe 爱情面临选择 ni leng le juan le wo ku le 你冷了倦了我哭了 yi kai shi de bu kuai le 一开始的不快乐 ni yong ka pian shi xie zhe 你用卡片拭写着 you xie ai zhi gei dao zhe zhen de dong le 有些爱只给到这真的懂了 zen me le ni lei le shuo hao de xing fu ne 怎麽了 你累了 说好的 幸福呢 wo dong le bu shuo le ai tan le meng yuan le 我懂了 不说了 爱淡了 梦远了 kai xin yu bu kai xin yi yi xu shuo zhe ni zai bu she 开心与不开心 一一叙说着 你在不舍 na xie ai guo de gan jue dou tai shen ke wo dou hai zi de 那些爱过的感觉都太深刻 我都还记得 ni bu deng le shuo hao de xing fu ne 你不等了 说好的 幸福呢 wo cuo le lei gan le fang shou le hou hui le 我错了 泪干了 放手了 后悔了 zhi shi hui yi de yin yue he hai xuan zhuan zhe yao zen me ting ne 只是回忆的音乐盒还旋转着 要怎么停呢 x2 zen me le ni lei le shuo hao de xing fu ne 怎麽了 你累了 说好的 幸福呢 wo dont le bu shuo le ai tan le meng yuan le 我懂了 不说了 爱淡了 梦远了 wo dou hai ji de 我都还记得 ni bu deng le shuo hao de xing fu ne 你不等了 说好的 幸福呢 wo cuo le lei gan le fan shou le hou hui le 我错了 泪干了 放手了 后悔了 zhi she hui yi de yin yue he hai xuan zhuan zhe yao zen me ting ne 只是回忆的音乐盒还旋转着 要怎么停呢 0 comment[s] | back to tophere i am to update lerh!yeapps! so,when should i start from?? hmmmmmm. okayys. lets talk about sarturday.. i took minghua's wallet on accident.. then i went to return him on saturday to return him.. felt bad..was wondering how he is going to eat without money. well..but it seems like yeah... he went off after that..what to do? hurhur.used to it ba. ((: so..only left with two girls when i came, that is Hui Xian and Baobei.. due to me lei-ness, i was kinda anti-social.. so i saw clement sitting there alone? so i went to speak to him about what i saw at his blog.. to my amaze, mingyao they all was looking at us.. it makes clement very awkward.. then he keeps saying they are looking at him keep asking me to go back.. ,_, kinda awkward.. come to show care kena chased away.. sian..make me xia bu liao tai! *faints* hmmms.. then they decided to go jurong point to look for new year's clothes. so ya..i went with them..so..on the way, baobei was talking to me about her problems.. she cried..i almost cry too..but held on.. i was trying to hush her down..ya..so yeah, bet she is feeling better le ba :) sometimes i feel lousy of myself because whenever my friends say they are ugly and say i am not, they have more friends caring for them than me. sick of all these negative words from themm. i know it in my heart that no matter how hard i try, i will never get even half of what they have.. they have care i don't have, but they always tell me how ugly they are, how these and that. then give me all the love and care people gave you! i switch body with you! sometimes i think humblity does hurts. unless your humblity is real. haiz. sick of all these.. when i tell them i am ugly, they will say i am not. haiz. is it fact or is it just trying to console me?? haiz..you guys do not seems to understand.. okayy i know, some of you will say i assume it. then don't show hidden messages for me to assume, make sure your verbal tally with your actions! siann! :( TSK! my panda owner is going to malaysia for work.. i will be really bored without you.. thankyou for all the care you gave me.. thankyou for all the comfort.. thankyou for understanding.. i will miss you,yes i do. please come back soon! sms me okayys?! i will feel lonely without yoo.. (((((((((((((((': 0 comment[s] | back to topPhew.at last i am done with S33's forum. Heys guy, do come and join our fashion forum! www.s33family.ning.com anyone is welcomed! (: Today i did not give tuition.. i want to give myself some personal space. today i did the S33 forum and read some notes. i felt so relaxed. no longer so tensed up :) tomorrow need to be in school early again! gosh* i am darn tired liaos. looking forward to this evening's meeting with my precious, P.ass ! LOVES! 0 comment[s] | back to topwow! at last i am done with editing the blog.*phew* although it is not purfect luhh. my first time mahs.. forgive me luhh hor! HAHA! but i like it.. i think it is cool luhh ((: my goodness.. financial accounting and statistic is killing me. i really know nothing about it. i go there seat down for 3hours, go out with a *learn nothing* brain! i am dying le la! shhh! shHhh! *must walk by faith* 1....2....poof! delph delph has erased *walk by sight* and learnt...*walk by faith* . today i went to teach my student today again as usual.. very sian luhh! it is so hot there. got fan like no fan one! *faints* TSK TSK TSK! my pay is dragggggggged again! it definitely spoils my day again! i hate the management there. don't know what the hell is wrong with it! yeah,i know that the boss was overseas. so what? i mean do i have to tolerate it just cos you did not prepare for the worst? TSK!!!!! haiz. forget it! haha!i am looking forward to my meeting with PRECIOUS! i really hope i can give out my house for saturday cell group. God, i need your help in this. :) TAGS REPLIED: Sandy: take care too(: love yoo too ^^ Shannon: love yoo alot alot O! Hermano Vicente: yeah,thanks. i will wait patiently for it (: 0 comment[s] | back to topi want to remember this night.a night,a dinner with P.ass and kenneth. thankyou so much for making the effort to come. P.ass , you are the best((: Kenneth,you are always so promise-fulfilling(: thankyou both of yoo.. yoo guys make my day,water my anger and lighten my dark day(: we had a dinner at Cafe CArtel, P.ass ate creamy mushroom pasta, i ate tictatoe platter and kenneth ate Fish and Chips. unknowingly,Kenneth gave us a treat. Thankyou Kenneth! ******************************************************** saturday morning 9am, i have to rush to Sarah's(my student) house to give tuition. you know? i am really tired. all my days make me cooped up like a hen! arghhh! i want to break free! i am so tired..that i felt so pek chek! i need someone to empathise with me. school load is driving me crazy. i am trying real hard to strike a balance between # cell group # lessons # projects # reach-outs # connect group # relations ; friendship # car lesson # financial problem i have with myself # financial problem at home # bible studies # probation from parents ARGHHHHH! i am going crazy! i need someone to really love me. i don't know.. suddenly i want so much a person to love me, dote me wholeheartedly.. but i know... welll....maybe he will appear but definitely not now. haiz! i need love.. i need care... arghhs! *relac* okayy..at least i still have Jesus. ----------ENDED----------- i need someone to love me doesn't mean i will anyhow hop into a relationship! and i don't! i get to know a guy named Winston! OMY OMY! he says what i very pretty. hey!someone with eyes knowing i am NOT! =X i hate it when people praise me wrongly! so ya..well well! i have no chemistry with him! so NO WAY! NO NO NO! and i also don't think it is the right time to get into a relationship too! so yeah.no no! i want a husband-criteria not a boyfriend that i can find anywhere~ so..yeah..and there is nothing from the top to the bottom,from the left to the right that i can fall for him for! so..yeah..far toooooo away from my basic expectations. i think i rather choose the P.P or K.C instead of him! HAHAHAHA! ROARS~ he is darn irritating! simply got enough of him! gosh! i am actually *scared of him! so..gonna stay a distance from him.. no personal time with him.. i don't know him well,cant possibly gauge what he will do. right?right? NO,left!HAHA! *entertaining myself* =XxX SP and his father also think he is a dangerous guy! okayys.for this topic : **************ENDED**************** 0 comment[s] | back to topwhoa.very very tired.. *yawns* studying and working.. so packed. no time for shopping nothing at all. tired ahhh roars! Schedule of this remaining days of the week: Friday : 2pm-5pm school night - dinner with cogcs Saturday : 9am-11am tutoring 2pm-5pm school 6pm-?pm li xin's birthday Sunday : 8am-9.30am car lesson 11am-2.30pm? service 3pm onwards needa help parents so tiring!roars! i will be missing alot of peepos. nevermind,be strong! i made a decision and i will work towards it, no matter what comes may(: cheer on, P.ass! LOVEs yoo! To people who loves to discriminate others : be careful.you reap what you sow. i shall not curse yoo nor hate yoo for i will be on the same level as yoo. please learn to carry yourself like a human not a cunning fox or snake. ((: wake up. it's never too late. TAGS REPLIED :
0 comment[s] | back to top whoo! tomorrow need to hand up my business communications de homework liaos. it is like so hard luhh. but tomorrow after MPO i will have to chiong. 加油 ! delph delph ~! i gotta work hard, clear all my subjects with As! shine for God and shine for my parents. i want to be a good testimony! ((: at home.. at school.. at church.. and at cell group.. this time round no unnecessary of pon-ing classes. bind it bind it bind it in Jesus's name! i have been teaching a primary 2 student Chinese at Parc Oasis. the pay is quite low,just that i am trying to get experience luhh. they are quite nice to me though(: i must EXCEL! i hope i can attend church this week,every week and cellgroup! pleaseeeee pleaseeeeeee! Labels: don't be like a sponge. Let the attack roll off like water on glass . You don't have to let the negative comment affect you. ((:, If someone says anything negative about you 0 comment[s] | back to topDo you believe that 只要努力付出，幸福就会来敲门? it is kinda irony? i believe it and somehow i don't believe it. yeah. it is like sometimes i really put in alot of effort, i get like rubbish. left there unappreciated? yeah. but i am still kicking with Jesus's power((: i am having an eye infection. gosh* eyes so red.. like tomato. haha.. but now abit better luhh. thanks God. i have fast 6days . jiayou ba. it is really hard. temptations upon temptations. arghh. i really in need of finding a secretplace with God. still finding. update again(: Labels: 只要努力付出，幸福就会来敲门 0 comment[s] | back to topwell. i have my last service together with my S33 (:well, though did not really spend time, but it's okayy luhh(: some of them were there with me to visit Cynthia. thanks all(: but like what MingYao told me, i shall not live in fear for i have God. In the Bible it says, "All things is possible with God." i think i should really be IN with God's things. will have to go for sunday service. well..i guess i just have to gel myself up with God. sometimes i do really get drained when reaching out. i am really so frustrated. sometimes it seems like no matter how hard i try, things just don't work out. maybe i have rely too much on myself? and the fact that i have HIGH EXPECTATIONS of myself. times after times i expect myself to do things really well. i take things far too seriously that when i fall, i got desperate and break down easily. i am kinda so drained,seriously. i always say i need comfort, why? why i always down Down DOwn DOWn DOWN!? i hate myself for being like a real harvester. i mean i feel like i should not be sad liddat,ya? cos i have God, but why do i still feel sad? i mean it is weird for me?! i feel like screaming the peepos' heads off saying, "I need love just like other girls need okayy?! just that i don't portray my weakness to you guys! why?cos i am just too afraid i will get even more sorrows when i show yoo i am sad and you leave me alone! i am far to fearful to be hurt. This is far too sensitive for me. i know i have to try to open myself up again,but you know how afraid i am? times after times i am hurt again and again. i do not have this courage to show my weak side. I know through God,all is possible, but you guys aren't even CLOSE to me. The mouth keep saying i love you also no use,you guys understand?i feel no love. and the way you guys look at me at times are like as if i am doing something wrong but the worse part is you guys say "nothing".well..then why look at me with that kind of eyes? I can say i hate you guys to be biased against the others. have i not put in effort? just that i don't show. BIASED! you guys are BIASED! No matter how much effort i put in, it is never gonna be put into use. You may not think you did that, recall all the friendships you guys have with me! good? did you guys befriend me because you guys have to or because you guys really wanna befriend me?? i hate fakers! unreal people. you never know how much an unreal person can hurt you until you faced them. The reason i am being real is because i want you to know who i am. Though i admit i don't show my weakness. other than that i am who i am. Accept me for who i am,cant? Go away! i am tired of pleasing you guys! well.. peace(:" OKAY, i have poured out all i wanted to say. E-N-D! in the rest of 2009, i will look at them with a clean paper again and shall not rake the past (: tata! Labels: 我愛你不是因为你是谁，而是我在你面前可以是谁。 0 comment[s] | back to topmy bestie's leg is swollen.and what. she got admitted to Alexandra hospital. from a scratchh to become swollen. *sayang* i am like damn worried for her luhh!! people who cares,go visit her okayys?(: spread your love o! Visiting Hours: 12.00 pm - 2.00 pm 5.00 pm - 8.00 pm Only 2 visitors are allowed to visit a patient at any time. please, everyone let's pray for her okayys!! God, I pray for that Cynthia will be healed in Your name, all swollen-ness will be binded in Jesus's name! In Jesus's name I pray,Amen! i am set free(: thankyou my precious,shannon for her MP4. this MP4 of hers is a precious to her and she lent it to me on 1 Jan 2009. it definitely accompanied through my dark night. thankyou so much precious. any loving words shall be updated on the next post(: today i vomitted 5 times! GOSHHH!i am so blotted! i did not eat much. but i am just not feeling well. AND what? today i went to eat dinner at Benten Cafe. Let the pictures speak(((:  Benten cafe's meal for buddy look at polarguin's *stressed face*he was like ,"OH MY!!SO BIG?!" i was like haha! yoo can't rely on me! i am SICK!  this is my favourite ice cream-oreo something?LOL. i am adoring my ice cream *slurp* polarguin's ice cream- tropical something i think? what do you call this expression?*勉强吃我的雪糕* -laughs- i am going to fast for 30 days. -more souls to be saved. -me to break ZERO -peace upon everyone's life. -financial breakthrough 0 comment[s] | back to top |